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Secret Code: Let It Burn
Lie #4: Being married is the same as cohabiting and cohabitation helps marriage.
Being married is not the same as cohabiting because there is no life long commitment. Many people trade life long for long term & it’s not the same. Life long is a specific and definite amount of time. Long term is indefinite and varies with emotions.
Cohabitation doesn’t prepare you for what it’s like to be married because there’s no commitment. Cohabitation is for convenience, but when the convenience is gone a marital commitment (and obligation) should be there.
Also, once you’re overly involved with someone you’re only dating separating becomes a logistical nightmare. Arguments are skewed. At least when you’re married and break up there are laws that protect women.
Also sex should be saved for marriage. (1) Cohabitation will probably lead to sex. (2) If you’re not having sex but are cohabitating you’re stressing yourself out with no release or reward,
If you’re cohabitating now (1) get married immediately or (2) move out to save the long term relationship.
Lie #3 Marriage Stifles Passion. Marriage is monotonous.
Passion- strong and barely controllable emotion.
Stifling passion is okay in many scenarios (anger, lustful cheating, murder etc).
In marriage there is still very strong emotions and passion
It is actually more safety to express these emotion inside of a marriage.
I Corinthians 7:9 “It’s better to marry than to burn with passion.” Like fire is safe inside of a fire pit please “burn with passion” INSIDE of a marriage.
Lie #2 Sowing wild oats helps “get it out of your system”.
What is “it” that you’re trying to get out? If it’s lustful sexual sin…that’s not how you get rid of it. You don’t kill an animal by trying to overfed it. It will grow.
Married or unmarried we all struggle to not sleep with people we aren’t married to.
#1 Sex prevents cheating & you will have sex every night.
Sex doesn’t prevent cheating. Married or unmarried we all struggle to not sleep with people we aren’t married to. The issue isn’t sex the issue is lustful sinful attraction to people who aren’t your spouse.
However, I Corinthians 7:3-5 “The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”